


eternity

by gotham_ruaidh



Series: Gotham Writes for Imagine Claire & Jamie [69]
Category: Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-14
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-15 02:29:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11796546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gotham_ruaidh/pseuds/gotham_ruaidh
Summary: Imagine Claire and Jamie, freshly reunited in Voyager, reflect on what happened right after their wedding.





	eternity

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted at [Imagine Claire & Jamie](https://imagineclaireandjamie.tumblr.com/post/164138838242/what-if-jamie-and-laoghire-had-children-together) on tumblr

> “A long time ago, you asked me if I knew what it was between us,” I said.
> 
> His eyes rested on mine, so dark a blue as to be nearly black in a light like this.
> 
> “I remember,” he said softly. His fingers tightened briefly on mine. “What it is — when I touch you; when ye lie wi’ me.”
> 
> “I said I didn’t know.”
> 
> “I didna ken either.” The smile had faded a bit, but was still there, lurking in the corners of his mouth.
> 
> “I still don’t,” I said. “But—” and stopped to clear my throat.
> 
> “But it’s still there,” he finished for me, and the smile moved from his lips, lighting his eyes. “Aye?”
> 
> – Voyager

–

His eyes – the crinkles around the edges still new to her, but that shade of blue was not. It was the same shade their daughter shared, the same shade she had longed for so many years to see in his eyes once more.

So beautiful in the gray light of dawn – their first morning together.

She couldn’t help but remember another first morning – when he had asked her, so innocent, what it was between them. When she had almost cruelly tried to ignore him – and the simple meal of ale and bread and cheese he had scrounged for them at the inn, so that they could eat in privacy on the rain-swept moor.

For he already understood her, and respected her, as no man ever had – as no man ever would.

She had tried to lose herself that morning, in the mist and the wind and the scenery so beautiful it made her want to weep. For she could feel her heart tearing in two – fresh with awe and gratitude and lust for this man sitting beside her, who had shown her his whole heart last night, and given her the gift of himself with no expectation of reciprocity. Fresh with fear and regret for the man with Black Jack Randall’s face, the man she had – would? – vow to love and honor, the man whose gold ring had brought reality crashing back in. Had pushed all dreamy thoughts of Jamie and his smile and his hands so far from her mind. Turned his taste – still lingering on her lips – into ashes on her tongue.

Even then, she had dressed robotically. Restored with shaking fingers Frank’s ring on her left hand. Somehow stumbled her way downstairs – fearful of what the men would say in the taproom. But then Jamie was there, smiling in the doorway, and she didn’t see or hear anyone else.

And he had brought her to the hill in silence – laid out the simple breakfast – sat a bit removed from her. Given her space to process it all.

She had been honest with him that day – that no, it wasn’t usual and yes, it was different between them. But yet she still held herself back. Afraid of her heart. Disarmed by his honesty.

“Claire?”

Startled back to herself – back to Edinburgh – back to the brothel where she lay in bed with Jamie – WITH JAMIE, after so many years – tears sprang to her eyes.

And then he edged closer on the mattress, still grasping her hand with his, laying his other hand on her forearm. “Claire? Are ye all right?”

Tears spilled. “Your voice is so beautiful. I never…” she swallowed. “I never expected to hear you say my name again.”

His hands gripped her a bit more firmly.

“Then I’ll say it as often as ye wish me to,” he whispered. “If ye’ll maybe say mine as well?”

She sniffed – feeling so broken, feeling so alive.

“Jamie – ”

The column of his long, sweet throat trembled.

“Oh, Claire – my love,” he rasped. “Claire – ”

She sat up on her elbows and lunged at him.

He caught her, gently brought her to the mattress, held her so tight. Hearts beating – bursting – against each other.

“It’s still there, Jamie,” she hiccupped. “It’s always been there.”

“Hush, Claire.” He eased one long leg between hers, arms locked around her shoulders, fingers tangled in her hair. “I ken. I ken weel.”

Slowly, slowly she began sliding her center over the curve of his hip.

He moaned, from somewhere low in his throat – full of so much feeling – and her heart leapt at the so-familiar sound.

“I – I was too scared to tell you then, Jamie.” Her breath hitched.

He stayed exquisitely still, but his hands trembled where they touched her. “Tell me what, my Sassenach?”

She rested his forehead against hers – noses crashing together – lips hovering, close enough for a kiss.

“That it’s different because of *you*. That you,” she licked parched lips, limbs tingling now, belly tense, craving release. “You give me life. From the – from the very first.”

His eyelashes fluttered against her nose. His lips parted, breath hot against her chin. His tears slick between their cheeks.

“I was dead,” he panted.

Swiftly his hand tilted her hips and he slid home.

Her gasp – surprise, want, joy – was everything.

He pulled back – and watched her curls, those curls that chased his dreams and haunted his nightmares, ripple across the pillow. And those whisky eyes widen in surprise, before the pupils went all black with want – want for him, want for this, want for a life together with him. And her mouth smiling, so so wide, reflecting the pure ecstasy bursting from his every pore.

Her legs wrapped around his hips, bringing them closer.

She reached her right hand – still so miraculously wearing his ring – and brushed away his tear with her thumb, and cupped the apple of his cheek in her palm. He turned his head to kiss the pulse in her wrist. So alive. Thank God.

His heart cracked wide open.

“And now look,” he sobbed, “I am alive forever and ever!”

–

“I was dead, and now look, I am alive for ever and ever!” – Revelation 1:18


End file.
